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CITY IS WAITING FOR YOU
From here to there...to San Francisco
Saturday, October 13, 2012
As I walk along in the neighborhood today; as I do every day; I looked up and saw the clouds pass by and thought of the time that is going so fast. The clouds I look at now are not the same clouds I saw yesterday, or are they? I wonder; for this a different time of day and a different day of the week. Even as the seasons start to show signs of changing; I know time has something to do with it.
The burst of a cool breeze wakes me of my trance on the clouds and thinking of the difference. I continue to walk and take in the sights that see every day, but today my thoughts are about how fast things are going. I saw a baby that is now in school, a dog that once was a puppy, and people moving in and out of the area. Things are changing constantly without me even being present all the time. Just think each blade of grass has changed; as well as the flowers; as well as the leaves that were green that are now browning and fluttering to the ground. “Nothing stays the same; everything must change”, when I heard it off a Quincy Jones album.
Time seems to passing me by. I feel like I am standing still and everything around me is changing; everything but me. I still get up every blessed day and wonder what the day will bring. I think back of my childhood and wonder or try to remember if I was happy. No, I am not a child any longer; I am a grown woman with children of my own. It is not that I am sad of the changes, but wonder what I can do to change me. Am I in a rut? Am I stagnant? Or is it that I am just bored. I am not bored with life. I like to think I have a reason for being here upon this earth.
I can hear the words of my eldest sister in my head. She told me when I was younger as she still tells me now as a grown woman, “be patient my dear. You have to have patience; everything you want that is meant to be yours will come in time.” I know the meaning of the word, but I thought I did have it…at least from time to time. See, there goes that word again. TIME!!!
It seems that my wishes are so far out of reach. I stretch out my arms, I stretch my thoughts to it farthest thought, and I even keep working towards whatever my future is to be. Yes, I can say a future, for it is over until it is over and I am far from over. Even as I hear the clock tick; times is going by. STOP! WAIT A MINUTE! BE QUIET! PAUSE! TAKE A BREAK; HANDS OF THE CLOCK STOP FOR JUST A MOMENT. I guess it would be awful if I asked the earth to stop spinning, so I won’t. I am not trying to hurt anyone. Just catch up on some time, for I feel that there is more behind me than ahead of me.